You hear this a lot in writing classes and tutorials and from teachers.

Show, don’t tell.

What we mean by this?

Don’t write that John Smith is a hard working player (or worse, don’t quote somebody saying those words). Write that he is in the gym at 5:30 a.m. every day, taking 200 shots.

Don’t write that Kate Jones is a team leader. Write that when a freshman on the team was homesick and struggling, she took her to dinner and talked with her for three hours to help her out.

See what I mean?

The point of showing, not telling, is to elaborate the story you are telling with details. That’s what makes a profile vibrant. They were specific, not general. Jeff Passan didn’t tell you Drew Robinson was depressed, he showed you exactly what he was feeling. Wright Thompson didn’t tell you what Archie Manning experiences when walking around Ole Miss, he showed you.

This comes through the reporting process. When someone says Kate Jones is such an amazing team leader, ask “can you give me a specific example or two of this? Is there a story that really captures her leadership?”

Didn’t get that in your interviews? No worries - this is why, when you talk to someone, you always say “If I have any follow ups, is it OK if I shoot you a quick message?” Don’t be afraid to follow up with a polite “Hey, you said this, can you tell me more?”